rezoned

I've been away.

Not so far away, really, but it felt like a long way from home. No anchors, no routines.

That the days were ordered primarily around meals seems kind of gross and intagram cultish.

But really, it's not so surprising.

When all the jobs, responsibilities, ambitions and craziness is stripped away, it's meals that give the day their shape.

Morning cups of tea, quick fiery lunches, lavish banquets with friends, wickedly good treats.

And a lot of talk. I met lots of new people and spent some good unhurried time with old friends. It was good. And very delicious.

At the same time I was conscious of how little energy I had. I was a bit like the proverbial rabbit int he headlights. Even my vague thoughts of activity were lost and I didn't visit the galleries or gardens or even some good friends I thought I might. I'm feeling so much older these days and in need of some major life change. I'm doing my best to accept it in good grace and adopt a deliberately slower pace. Wish me luck with that.

It was much more delightful to arrive home than I had anticipated, absence and fonder hearts and all. The day after my return we shared our first evening meal together as a family in over a week and it was good to exhale, sit on the old quilt and just be together.

Afterwards the kids drew on the paving with chalk while D and I did as little as possible.

When the kids were in bed we plotted about presents and activities for the summer. We made a few plans and I even did a list or two, though really my hold is pretty loose this year. I think it's going to be a bit of a bare minimum kind of time for a while yet.